friend successfully connects to server, but the world does not load for him. Suspecting network speeds.

[RATTLEGOAT]

Hello and happy new year. I have a forge server running 1.18.1 and 3 mods: Biomes O' Plenty, Macaw's Doors, and TerraBlender (a compatibility mod for Bo'P I believe). The server is running on a physical server at home with a good amount of RAM (32 GB is reserved for the minecraft server, but there are other things hosted on there).

I, the man on the same network, can join completely. But here's the twist: I was able to join from california (I live in colorado) with no issues, so port forwarding is not the issue. I already set that up. This was on my laptop, but I can join from my tower at home as well. On to my friends side:

He clicks join, gets past all the encrypting and joining pages, and appears in the void, falling. while explaining the poetic existentiality of it, he gets booted out, with the dreaded exception:

[21:14:53 INFO]: FriendsName lost connection: Timed out

I suspect two things: The first, and more likely, is that his internet is only 30-40 megabits per second (I think). I'm honestly not sure why that would be the issue, but I'm getting desperate. 

the second is that I heard talk of if you have differences in router types, it could cause issues. not sure where I saw this though. secondly, I'm also not sure why this would be the issue because he is able to connect fully, it's just that nothing loads in.

 

P.S.: We also tried me disconnecting and him joining, which still did not work. so it's also not the allotted RAM or memory that's the issue.

 

Thanks! Let me know if you need any info from my side.  

[RATTLEGOAT]

additionally, my server always gives me the warning:

 

[10:24:47] [Server thread/WARN]: Can't keep up! Is the server overloaded? Running 2055ms or 41 ticks behind