This log shows the server taking a full minute to run a single game tick, and given how many mods you have there I'm not sure I'm surprised.
Is this a published modpack or mods you put together?
You don't open the installer, you run it.
If Java is installed, it should handle running the jar.
However, if the jar is being opened by a program like winRAR, try Johann Löfflmann's JarFix utility to fix the file association.
The JVM arg doesn't fix it, we need to wait for either Apple to provide backwards compatibility with M1's or GLFW, LWJGL, and Mojang to accommodate the API changes in the M1
1.12 is no longer supported on this forum.
Please update to a modern version of Minecraft to receive support.
The fact that you don't want to move past a certain mod does not change the rules.
The root of it is GLFW using an API that is no longer exposed on M1's, so either Apple needs to implement a backwards compatible API or GLFW needs to update, and if GLFW updates LWJGL would need to update, and then Mojang would need to ship the updated LWJGL